Edith and Archie – Go to Paris (Page 37, # 4) Edith and Archie Bunker are inserted into “The Absinthe Drinker” by Edgar Degas
The setting is a quaint bistro that serves as the local pub as well. Seated at a corner booth is a French couple drinking Absinthe. Just then the door opens and in walks a Middle Age American couple.
Edith: “Awrchee”, “I’m so glad you bwought me here to Paris. I am so excited I cannot believe that we arh actuawlly here.
Archie: “Aw Edith will you just “Shud up Already!” I’m trying to concentrate here and –you see I jus want to go in here and have a niceTiukey samwhich and a Beear.”
Edith: “Oh Awrchee its Just, I’ve never been to Pairs before and I am so excited, I can’t believe the things I’m seeing.”
“Awrchee, It is so much fun, like when you was courtin me, Like on Friday Nights you used to take me to that Italian Resteraunt, Mawriseeo’s and You always ordered like you knew I’Talyen. We used to Laugh and Laugh.”
Archie: “Yah Hee hee”
Edith: “You were Always so Romantic…Awrchee”
Archie:” Edith Don’ start, you know I can’t do nothing when I’m hungry.”
Edith: Oh Awrchee, No, I wouldn’t do that.
Edith Leans in and whispers to Archie: “Awrchee… Don’t look now, but that couple in the cornor booth, what do you think that Green stuff is that they is drinkin?”
Archie: “Edith, Don’t start that. You know it’s not polite to stare”
Edith: “Awrchee, I know it’s not polite to stare, I was just thinking, I might want wan of them green drinks myself”
Archie: “Edith, You wouldn know more what to do with wan of them Green drinks anywho…”
Edith: “Awrchee, You take that Back, You take that Back right now!”
Archie: “Take What Back Edith!, I was jus saying, those that those meatheads drinking it look like they’ve seen a ghost, yur already batty enough as it is., I don need you all goo faced here in Paris”
Edith: “Oh Awrchee, yur jus mean”
Archie: “Your startin to cry there, Now don’t do that Edith, You know I can’t take that”
Edith: “Your Right Awrchee, Les just eat and go find our Hotel and tomorrow we can go out an find the Eyfull Tower., it will be so Romantic”
Archie: “Sure Edith, Whatever you say, whatever you say”
The Waiter approaches, the American couple order their food..